Andrew Kevin Walker spikes cortisol levels by midmogging the theatercels and reviewgooners despite colywoly’s hopemaxxing
My brain has been irreversibly damaged by Gen Alpha looksmaxxing slop, and yes, I know I’m the prototypical chud specimen.
That said, if you’re looking for strong character development and deep emotional story lines then World War Mog might be a better starting point…
For some personal context, crime thrillers (specifically, of the serial killer variety) were my first true love of horror’s many sub-genres. One of the first films that left me utterly speechless was Silence of the Lambs. It’s impossible to not be in awe of Anthony Hopkins’ performance. Not to mention the depth of characters, strong narrative, and one of the most spine chilling final sequences of any movie to date. SotL is a perfect movie.
And there are so many iconic movies in this horror-sphere; to name a few personal favorites:
- Cure
- Red Dragon
- Se7en
- Longlegs
- “but colywoly Longlegs is just a rip-off of Cure and Nicolas Cage’s acting is terrible and and and…”
- Ok. I said I liked it. I didn’t say it was good.
Notice which movie is not on that list???
Yep, you guessed it: Psycho Killer.
What a disappointment, especially coming from the writer of Se7en.
This movie is bereft of any of the qualities that set aside the several films I listed above. It’s a tight 90 minutes that begs the question “why?” over and over again until you just can’t take it anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE a short film, but not at the expense of valuable backstory and character development.
Unfortunately, Psycho Killer is awash with throwaway characters, awkward line deliveries, and enough lazy tropes to elicit reflexive groans from even a casual fan. This movie is suffering from more of an identity crisis than a Silicon Valley tech bro with a goth girl kink (certainly not referring to myself).
None of this is more evident than through our half-assed heroine, officer Archer, who honestly had so much potential:
- Witnessing the brutal murder of her husband
- A strong sense of pride as an officer that is constantly at odds with the realities of a bureaucratic law force
- Her dad was (presumably) an officer as well
Yet we don’t get any time to really digest or appreciate these details. The combination of soulless acting and crummy dialogue gives these characters about as much depth as a puddle in the Arizona summer. All of the information we get is snuck in through brief, lazy dialogue so we can rush to the next senseless murder money shot.
This movie couldn’t decide if it wanted to be a campy slasher or a brooding crime thriller, so instead it lands somewhere in between. Just rushed, disingenuous, trope-abusing slop that has a weirdly high opinion of itself.
The only saving grace of this film is that the design of the killer is decently cool. He’s got a sick mask and tattoos and the visual symbolism hidden in his clues is at least somewhat well thought out.
Oh, and the mansion sequence was pretty entertaining too. Probably the only instance where we get to spend an extended amount of time with some characters… enough to let real tension build while layering in plenty of fun gore.
As far as the positives, that pretty much sums it up.
I so desperately wanted to enjoy this movie. Instead I’ve had much more fun shitting on it relentlessly. At least it serves some purpose for those of you looking to join in on the fun.
Anyway, I think you can see where this is going…
Psycho Killer gets a resounding:
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